The term "love brain" is used to describe those who abandon all reason and lose themselves in love. However, psychologists point out that love brain is a manifestation of extreme insecurity and emotional deprivation, forming an "obsessive attachment"—an intense craving for intimacy coupled with a fear of abandonment, characterized by an excessive pursuit and need for control in relationships, leading to a loss of self within love.
“恋爱脑”一词被用来形容那些在爱情中不顾一切、失去自我的人。但心理学家指出,恋爱脑是极度不安、极度缺爱的表现,形成“痴迷性依恋”,十分渴望亲密关系又害怕被抛弃,对爱有过度的追求与控制,在爱情里面没了自我。
Within such individuals lies a vast emotional void; subconsciously, they believe that only through others' love can their own worth be validated. When they enter a relationship, they develop a cognitive bias of "without you, I am incomplete."
这类个体内心存在一个巨大的情感空洞,他们潜意识中相信,只有通过他人的爱才能证明自己的价值。当他们陷入一段关系时,会产生一种“没有你,我就无法完整”的认知偏差。
One of the core features of love brain is the excessive pursuit of love and unhealthy need for control. They may frequently check their partner's updates, overanalyze every minor action, and exhibit extremely low tolerance for uncertainty in the relationship.
恋爱脑的核心特征之一是对爱过度的追求与不健康的控制。他们可能频繁查看伴侣的动态,过度解读每一个微小行为,对关系中的不确定性表现出极低容忍度。
Psychologists refer to this behavioral pattern as "anxious attachment." Such individuals often hold the core belief that "I am worthless, and I need you to love me to feel complete." They tend to choose avoidant partners, creating an "anxious-avoidant" relational cycle that further intensifies their insecurity.
心理学家将这种行为模式称为“焦虑型依恋”。这类人往往有着“我没有价值,我需要你爱我才能感到完整”的核心信念。他们倾向于选择逃避型伴侣,形成一种“焦虑-回避”的关系循环,进一步加剧了他们的不安全感。
Those with love brain may not only overextend themselves in relationships but may even feel a sense of "stability" within emotionally abusive dynamics. Compared to the termination of a relationship, even a painful, abusive one can provide a false sense of security.
恋爱脑者不仅可能在关系中过度付出,甚至可能在情感虐待的关系中感到某种“安定”。比起关系的终结,即使是痛苦的、被虐待的关系也能提供一种虚假的稳定感。
For them, early-life trauma may have led to the mistaken belief that "as long as I try hard enough and endure enough, I can earn love." This pattern traps them in a cycle of repeating trauma, continuously experiencing similar pain in an attempt to resolve unresolved childhood issues.
对他们而言,可能因为早年的创伤让他们形成了“只要我足够努力、足够忍耐,就能获得爱”的错误信念。这种模式让他们陷入重复创伤的循环中,不断体验相似的痛苦,试图解决童年的未竟之事。
Psychologists point out that what love brain individuals are addicted to is often not a specific person, but rather the "feeling of being in love." This brief, intense emotional experience activates the reward system in their brains, providing temporary emotional relief and allowing them to briefly escape inner emptiness and insecurity.
心理学家指出,恋爱脑者上瘾的往往不是特定的人,而是“爱的感觉”。这种短暂的、强烈的情感体验激活了他们大脑中的奖赏系统,提供暂时的情绪缓解,让他们短暂地逃离内心的空虚和不安。
This addictive cycle closely resembles substance dependency: short-term pleasure is gained through repetitive behavior, yet it leads to long-term functional impairment. Each new relationship brings hope, and each ending deepens the trauma, yet they cannot help but seek the next relationship as a remedy.
这种成瘾循环非常类似于物质依赖:通过重复行为获得短期快感,却导致长期功能的损害。每一次关系的开始都带来希望,每一次关系的结束都加深了创伤,但他们仍然不由自主地寻求下一段关系作为解药。
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